Simon's Chart
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Two weeks ago Chris initiated the creation of a new chart for Simon.
I'm pretty sure the catalyst was a conversation we had while sitting in the driveway after visiting a middle school for Simon (that whole process is another story for another day). We were talking about structure, attitude, hopes & dreams, fears & frustrations, screen time, etc. The chart idea was originally brought up by a psychologist that we (and Simon) met with last summer - he encouraged a similar chart to establish a set of norms and rewards. We worked with it for a bit and then got distracted.
Basically, we let it go. And things were okay.
Fast forward to today and I'm thankful to Chris and Tiffany for taking the time to create and get a new chart going. This one is more specific than the previous one and deals more directly and concretely with screen time as a reward. The other chart had rewards like legos, pool time, new books, etc - all things he likes of course but not really as motivating or immediate.
The goal of this chart is specifically to create structure around screen time. Screen time (tv, computer, video games) is a big topic around here as Simon's definitely a fan of tv, movies and computer/video games. There's definitely a secondary benefit around teaching responsibility, respect, sharing of household duties, establishing clear expectations and routine (which we know he loves already).
The chart looks like this:
Keep in mind when looking at the chart that these tasks are very specific to Simon. Some are more relevant to Chris' house than my house and I'll be adjusting some of the tasks to reflect what needs to be worked on at my house (like feeding the animals).Anna's going to get a chart too and her responsibilities and extra credit tasks will be different from Simon's.
The chart includes a list of daily responsibilities that are simply non-negotiable things he needs to do each day. He needs to do them to even "qualify" to earn screen time. Some of these things he does daily already without complaint and others are a daily struggle.
The second list includes the ways he can earn screen time (with a max of two hours per day).
What we've learned in the last week and a half is that he's really motivated to earn screen time (feel like I should write "duh" here).
What I've noticed in just a week of using the chart is that he seems more present, more in tune, and more willing to do daily tasks without complaint. He's also eating non-preferred foods with less complaining (he's been doing much better in general with trying new foods, but it's still a big part of our daily dialogue and is anxiety inducing for him).
Last night he ate steak, roasted Brussels sprouts and peaches with minimal complaints. He fed the animals without me even asking him first - he saw the clock said 5pm and he knew it was time for them to eat. When he completes a task he goes over to the chart and puts a smiley face in the appropriate box.
I definitely still need to monitor the time he actually spends in front of a screen but this process has given us something concrete to turn to - something he understands because he can see it, read it and comprehend what needs to be done to earn time.
The lessons for me? Keep trying. Don't give up. Ask for help. Documentation and visual lists are great for Simon (again, not something new to me but I needed the reminder and, humbly, for someone to take the initiative and make it happen).
Go Simon, go.
EDITED |You can download the Excel version of this chart for customization here.
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91 comments
Love this Ali. Thanks for sharing!
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Simon seems pretty advanced as we can see he has at least some play skills my son is way younger he is 4 now with Autism and frustrates me sometimes that he just cares already for technology but I guess this things give to him what he can't see on toys.
So we use in our benefit to teach I do video modeling for him and he watches it. Also we have a visual schedule as he is not that verbal, and he can't read yet. But they definitely learn what rewards are no matter the age.
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He's definitely grown and developed over time. Picture schedules were so totally helpful for him at that age too. We've also tried to view technology as an access point for him for both communication and education. There are lots of positives that have come from it for him but we also want to encourage real life interaction/limits on the hours as well.
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You're the best - I've been wanting to create something similar for my son. Thanks, you've made it that much easier. I'm completely with you on reducing screen time. The novelty of the iPad in this house has worn and it's become such an easy thing for the kids to grab all the time. we locked it down a while back. They don't like that they don't know the password but it's for the best! Good luck and go Simon, go! I can't believe how big he's gotten....take care.
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[...] the things I’ve been thinking about quite a bit around here and have recently shared such as limiting screen time and evaluating my schedule. I love reading about this kind of stuff – taking it in, trying it [...]
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Thanks for sharing Ali! I need to do something similar for my kids.
Glad to hear that Simon is doing well with his chart.
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I love your chart :) Our HFA son has been constructing his own chart with our help for about a year or so. We had to do this for his computer time. He could sit on it all day researching whatever topic he loves at the moment or watching scenes over and over in a movie lol.
It really does do for him what you explained it does for Simon. It's funny how this visual, these choices he chose can really motivate him.
Oh boy in August we start middle school and yes that in itself is another whole story. We are more worried than he is but we do have some lone talks and explaining and calming down about life everyday in middle school.
I hope you will update on how Simon is in school. It will give me comfort knowing I am not alone :)
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Thank you Ali for this, just at a time we needed some re-focus with our Autistic son. I have always been inspired by your journey with Simon. Fantastic to see how far Simon has come :-)
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[...] in conjunction with one another that seemed so awesome. It might have had something to do with the new chart set up – I’m not sure. Whatever it was, I noticed it and my heart was [...]
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I'm not able to access the Excel chart for some reason. I have a Mac but that's usually not an issue. Any chance of a pdf or other file sharing? It's a GREAT concept!!!
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Hey Dani - did you try downloading again? I use a Mac and am able to open it here.
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Ahhh, such a great idea! One of those "why didn't I think of that" moments, for sure. My husband and I have been struggling with how to implement a system like this for my oldest daughter (she splits her time between our house and her dad's house), and this post came at a perfectly inspirational time. Thank you for sharing!
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Thank you for the chart! Just printed one for each of our girls! Have "talked" about it for over a year but needed a little help too! Thank you and whoever set it up for you!!! :)
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[...] week nine includes two inserts. The first is Simon’s chart and the text that went along with my post and the second is my February Day In The [...]
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Timers work great for keeping track of screen time. Use something with a bell or beeper and once you set it you can forget it until the beeper goes off.
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[...] really, all this regaining control started with the chart a few months back. It’s all a [...]
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