Seeing.

Hi Ali! I just wanted to mention as a Mom of three that we experience the same as well. What we have found as an amazing tool to help is the Leapfrog Leapster. This is the most amazing product ever..not only a learning tool but amazingly my children's favorite toy. The Dora software is a must have for Simon's age group. We don't go anywhere without ours! And now all my friends and parents whom I provide childcare for agree!
Julia

Wow - you have gotten some GREAT advoce here, not sure I can add to it too much but...
We developed a 'circle' of local restaurants where Zeb felt safe, knew the menu and could be comfortable. It took some time. We started with places that served fast and were lenient re: children's behavior. We worked our way up to moreadult restaurants.
I found the Social Stories concept to be very useful. We would go over with him where we were going, how long we might be there, what was expected of him (and us) and how he would be asked to behave.
"Sometimes, mommy & daddy really like to take Simon out for a special meal. They love spending time with Simon, and want him to go new places and have fun with them. Tonight, mommy & daddy are taking Simon to __________(name of the restaurant). It is (describe the interior of the restaurant - colors, smells, what the chairs are like, etc). While we are there, Simon will have ____to play with and will eat_____. We will be there about (amount of time), and Simon will be allowed to get up from the table (# of times) and go for a walk with mommy or daddy. Mommy & daddy are really looking forward to having this time with Simon, and they really hope everyone has a good time." You can make a little journal with photos for him if you find a particular place you all really like to go.
We also found these inflatable chair pads for Zeb; they have knobs, or projections, on the seat. He can sit on it and by just barely moving around, he gets sensory input. It has made it possible for him to sit for extended periods of time without having to get up. It's less boredom (in the classic sense) with these kids, it's a need for sensory input. Giving him a way to get that without leaving the table gives you a win-win. Also, stretching a large rubber band between the front legs of the chair helps - he can fiddle with it with his feet (or put a footstool under the table and let him rock it with his feet).
Lastly, none of us ever knows if we're being too permissive or fighting too hard to control a behavior or situation - that goes for parents of neuro-typical children as well as 'diagnosed' kids. Parenting is more art than science, we just have to trust our hearts and use our heads. Easier said than done...
Sorry to go on so long. Hope you have found some of it to be useful. I find the best part of parenting is how often they just take my breath away; they is so amazing, smart, kind...I am so humbled by both Zeb and his 'typical' brother Wyatt. I only really get caught up in the diagnosis during the annual IEP review, when all we are talking about are deficits and how to allow for them, instead of all the great assets he has.
Blessings to you and yours.

Hi Ali. I am a scrapper and get onto twopeas almost every day and found your blog there. I also have a dd with PDDNOS; she's 7 1/2. I don't think that you did the wrong thing by letting your little guy roam around the table. Very typical for our children to not want to be seated for so long. We do the same thing, as long as dd is not disrupting anyone and usually she isn't.
Simon sounds wonderful.

I found your blog a few hours ago. The pictures struck me because I took Malia there a few weeks ago. A family friend of mine has a son with autism. I need to read more so I could comment better. :) I promise.

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